How A Charlie Brown Christmas saved me

The days just seemed to blend together like a gauzy old daguerreotype back in late 1974. I was working at a high end audio salon and my aborted attempt at trade/technical school had ended in failure. It's such a drag to make plans, execute them, and then find out it was all a really bad idea. What had sounded so good one and a half years ago now looked like a pipe dream. Ill conceived and poorly planned I turned my back on architectural drafting school and instead took a job selling audio which had become my true calling, at least in the 1970's. But the truth was, I wasn't making very much money at it and I was barely scraping by. It seemed that every time I cut back it was in the grocery department. My meals became more spartan and lean as my six foot frame fell to 125 lbs. While my roommate's family was visiting they felt the need to donate some of their pizza to my cause as I looked like I could use some. When my mother finally saw me she said that I looked like "a broom with pants". What a conquering hero I turned out to be.
My roommate had inherited a portable black and white TV which he stuck in the living room. It was a welcome luxury in this very bare-bones life that I was leading. I knew I couldn't go on living this way but I couldn't just leave. It would be an admittance of failure which my youthful pride and stubborn nature would never live down. I needed to change the dynamic, shake things up, get out if need be. But I didn't see it yet. All I could see was going to work and coming home. I did the same things, ate the same food and did it all over again the next day. At least lunch was wonderful. I would have a burger at Bob's Big Boy at the mall because it always cost a buck. I had to conserve because my '66 MGB would no doubt need some kind of repair so every day it didn't was another day I could keep the wolves away from the door.
One night in December I made my way back to our apartment and plunked myself down in the bean bag chair in the living room. I strained to reach out and turn the TV on and adjust the volume. I was alone in the apartment and soon I began to wonder what I would get for dinner. It would probably be the same thing I had last night and the night before...spaghetti or bean burritos. What to do with such delicious choices. I felt the weight of being away from home and wondering about my future all at once when finally I gave up thinking of food. I just sat and stared at the TV, not worrying or caring about what I was watching. Then in a split second my world changed. From the TV I heard the familiar piano riffs of Vince Guaraldi heralding the opening bars of "Christmastime is here..." A Charlie Brown Christmas had just come on and I smiled broadly while looking around and hoping that my roommate would walk in so I could watch it with someone. Anyone. But I watched alone and felt warm again as I recalled Christmases past with my family.



The TV show finished and I sat there in my bean bag chair without moving. I was happier than I'd been in more than a year. As soon as I got up to make my yucky dinner I knew what I needed to do. I needed to go home to my family and regroup, find a new direction. Surely I could be a race car driver or a professional tennis player or an actor. I'd better get started. I would go home to California's Central Coast and stay there for the next thirty years. It was a good move.
Those are the thoughts that race through my mind every time A Charlie Brown Christmas come on. Thoughts of going home to my family and of childhood memories of Decembers long past. It's coming on again in a few minutes and I'm going to watch it. You should too.